about who’s right, but
what God’s trying to teach you both.
Everything that happens in this world happens at the time
God chooses…. He sets the time for sorrow and the time for joy. The time for
mourning and the time for dancing, the time for making love and the time for not
making love, the time for kissing and the time for not kissing.
the Fight of fights.
I’m out of here!”
the silence. The confident standoff.
who blinks first!
leaves for a friend’s house that night.
sets on anger.
close on distant, self-satisfied pillows.
that do not close.
sleepless justification. Vindicating re-hash. Sharpened barbs. Re-enforced
defenses. A new zinger determined to mention next time.
alone, the accusers examine their bedroom ceilings, anticipating.
I won the argument.
last, seeping relentlessly through the brokenness, comes the fear of losing.
next evening, as husband and wife lie smiling in each other’s arms, they turn
to each other with a kiss and….
What is this, some kind of sadistic fairy tale? We’re
talking knock-down, drag-em-out brawl, and suddenly the two are making love?
How in the world did
to fight together!
—not against each other,
against your true, spiritual enemy.
Join bestselling author Gordon Dalbey and
his wife Mary, a psychologist, on this pioneering adventure through the wilderness
of marriage conflict into the blessing of maturing faith and growing love.
sex and finances to in-laws and parenting, here’s both tell-it-like-it-is truth
for those with ears to hear and show-it-like-it-can-be grace for those with
hearts to believe.
created man in his own image…
female he created them.
Because God’s image is reflected in man
and woman united, the enemy of God wants to destroy marriages, often by making
you think your partner is the enemy.
So that you will know the hope to which he has
called you, and how very great is his power at work in us who believe.
Foreword: It Was the Fight of Fights, but…
1 Finding Your
Starting Apart, Finishing Together
2 In the
Why It’s So Hard
3 Never Waste a
a Third Opinion from the Great Physician
4 For Better, for
Letting Go of Judgments (Mary Dalbey)
5 When You’re
Hot, You’re Hot; When You’re Not
Time to Talk about Sex
6 Hurt People
But Holy Spirit Heals
7 Leaving Father
The Trailhead to Marriage
8 For Richer, for
Whose Money Is It?
9 Staying Focused
Whose Child Is It?
How to Stop a Fight before It
11 Caution! I
Love Like You:
The Case for Grace
They say marriages are made in heaven.
So are thunder and lightning. (Clint
us, Father, for turning away from each other
of turning toward you.
*Anger is pain masquerading as power.
does not lift up one partner to humble the other;
lifts up Himself to humble you both.
*With the capacity to judge, it’s not
Paradise to a fight.
intimacy happens not by trying harder,
by surrendering more deeply to God and each other.
*Money exposes your values;
that’s why it’s such an explosive issue
loves your children because, like Him,
restore innocence to an awfully guilty world—even your own.
*Desperation is solid currency in the Kingdom of God.
you let Jesus heal your childhood wounds,
don’t need to act them out any more in your marriage.
True love grows out of great courage—
and great faith in the One who